Cat Commandments

I am a jealous cat. Thou shall not have any other species before me.

Judge not lest ye be catless.

Love your Cat as yourself.

The love of cat is the root of all humor.

Delight yourself in the cat and he will give you endless entertainment.

Thou shalt not deny cat of any fish, especially tuna.

Thou shalt feed cat on her schedule, not yours.

Thou shalt not move cat when cat is sleeping, even if it means you sleep on the floor.

Thou shalt leave toilet set up for cat.

Thou shalt amuse Cat, at Cat’s leisure.

Thou shalt provide lap for Cat to laze in.

Thou shalt not forget that thou art staff, and serve at the pleasure of cat, at all times.

Thou shalt not covet the Cat’s furry mouse, nor his catnip ball, nor his human servant nor anything else that is his.

Thou shalt provide catnip on a regular basis.

Thou shalt stroke Cat when they stand on your keyboard.

Thou shalt change the litter box daily.

Thou shalt provide patches of sunlight for cat.

Thou shalt praise Cat for dashing in front of you when you walk through Cat’s domain.

Thou shalt honor thy Cat, placing no other creatures above him.